Why Your Brain Feels Overloaded: Understanding Cognitive Load in Everyday Life
I want to start by saying that this is not a post to complain.
Even as I sit here writing it, part of me worries that it might sound that way. And while I am a therapist and mental health advocate, I am certainly not exempt from being human.
This past summer was probably one of the hardest seasons I've experienced when it came to simply being a capable human being. And that is saying a lot because I pride myself on being capable, even if sometimes it's more like chaotically capable.
On most days, I already carry the responsibilities that come with a lot of different titles. I'm a therapist, business owner, mom, speaker, podcast host, wife, daughter, and content creator.
But this summer, I added another title: Director of Logistics and Operations for Moving My Entire Family to Another State.
And apparently, that position comes with absolutely no training.
I found a house. Booked the moving company. Paid the bills. Signed the lease. Applied for new professional licenses. Figured out what we were keeping, selling, donating, packing, and throwing away—all while continuing to work, cook, parent, run a business, and keep everyday life moving.
I was stressed, but what surprised me most was what happened at the end of the day.
I would sit down and mindlessly scroll because watching a show meant I had to choose a show.
And apparently that was asking too much.
Reading wasn't much better. I love books, but choosing which one I wanted to read felt like another decision I didn't want to make.
So I scrolled.
It wasn't that I wanted to become a lump on the couch. It felt more like my brain had reached a point where it was saying: “That's enough. We're done making decisions now.”
Looking back, understanding what was happening probably would have helped me be a little kinder to myself. Instead, I kept pushing and then became frustrated when I couldn't accomplish everything I thought I should be able to do.
I knew I was capable. I just felt like I couldn't access that capability anymore.
What's Actually Happening? Understanding Cognitive Load
This is where understanding cognitive load becomes helpful.
Think of your brain as having a mental workspace. Psychologists often refer to part of this system as working memory—the information you're actively holding and using while making decisions, solving problems, following instructions, planning, or remembering what you walked into the kitchen for.
The important part?
That workspace has limits.
Cognitive Load Theory originally came from research on learning, but the basic concept helps explain something many of us experience in everyday life: your brain can only actively process so much information at once.
Now think about everything you might ask your brain to hold during a normal day.
Remember the appointment. Respond to the email. Figure out dinner. Pay the bill. Finish the report. Remember what your kid needs for tomorrow. Answer the text you forgot about yesterday.
None of those things alone may be overwhelming.
The problem is that they rarely arrive one at a time.
New information keeps coming in while your brain is still trying to manage what was already there.
Add constant task switching and repeated decision-making, and it isn't surprising that your brain eventually starts saying, Enough.
This is also where people sometimes use the term mental load. Cognitive load and mental load aren't exactly the same thing, but they can overlap. The more responsibilities, decisions, reminders, and unfinished tasks you're mentally carrying, the more crowded that mental workspace can feel.
From the outside, cognitive overload can look like procrastination, forgetfulness, irritability, zoning out, difficulty focusing, or avoiding decisions.
Sometimes what looks like: “Why can't I just do this?” may actually be closer to: “My brain has been doing too much for too long.”
And those are two very different conversations to have with yourself.
What Cognitive Overload Can Look Like in Real Life
Cognitive overload doesn't usually announce itself by saying, “Hello, your working memory is overwhelmed.”
It tends to sound more like:
“Why can't I focus?”
You sit down to finish one task and somehow end up checking email, opening four tabs, answering a text, and accomplishing almost nothing.
“Please just pick.”
Someone asks where you want to eat or what you want to watch, and making one more decision feels irritatingly difficult.
“I don't even know where to start.”
Six things need your attention, so instead of starting one, you freeze.
Or maybe you find yourself doing what I did: scrolling because it requires less effort than choosing what you actually want to do.
When that happens, our instinct is often to criticize ourselves.
But criticism doesn't create more mental capacity.
Reducing the load can.
Practical Tools: How to Reduce Cognitive Load
When your brain feels overloaded, the goal isn't necessarily to become better at handling more.
Sometimes the better strategy is to give your brain less to actively manage.
Here is one way to start.
1. Decide What Actually Needs Your Attention
A giant to-do list makes everything look equally important.
It isn't.
Try separating your tasks into:
Must: This genuinely needs to happen today.
Should: This would be helpful, but it can wait if necessary.
Could: This would be nice if I have the capacity.
The goal isn't to find a cleverer way to complete 25 things.
It's to decide which five actually deserve your attention right now.
Want to Learn More About Mental Overload?
If you're reading this thinking, “Okay, this explains a lot,” this is exactly what we're exploring this season on The Ariza Inspire Podcast.
The season looks at the mental load from several angles, including cognitive load, decision fatigue, task switching, and some of the reasons you can end a day feeling completely fried even when you don't feel like you “did enough.”
Start with Cognitive Load Theory: Feeling Fried When You Did Nothing, available beginning October 20, 2026, on audio and video platforms.
Your Brain Doesn't Need You to Try Harder All the Time
One of the biggest things I took away from this summer was realizing that struggling didn't necessarily mean I had suddenly become less capable.
I was carrying more. There is a difference.
Understanding cognitive overload wouldn't have made the boxes disappear or eliminated my responsibilities. But it might have stopped me from spending quite so much energy being frustrated with myself for struggling to do all of it.
Sometimes we don't need another productivity hack.
Sometimes we need to understand the system we're working with and respond accordingly.
If you want more practical mental health education like this, join the Ariza Inspire email list for new podcast episodes, articles, resources, and tools designed to help you better understand what's happening with your mental health—and what you can actually do about it.
